In the beginning, your newborn woke to feed around the clock. You probably expected this, so it wasn’t much of a shock that you had to drag yourself out of bed at 2 am and then again at 4 am to feed her. You might have even embraced zoning out to crap TV while you coaxed your little one back to sleep.

Eventually though, as the weeks of sleep deprivation stretched to months, the novelty probably wore off and life may have become more difficult. Your sleep deficit mounts and overall fatigue might begin to take its toll on you physically and emotionally. Depression is one result of chronic sleep deprivation. Decreased cognitive function is another area where you might begin seeing an impact from missing sleep. In layman’s terms, you might begin forgetting details and your multi-tasking abilities could suffer. Effective communication and alertness often lapse, also.

So, what can you do? First of all – go easy on yourself. Remind yourself how difficult your job is and give yourself permission to simplify life when you feel frazzled. While your baby struggles with a sleep schedule, realize that sleep for yourself should be a high priority. This means that you should choose a nap over washing dishes or scrubbing the kitchen floor. Aim to get eight hours of sleep in every 24-hour period, adding up all the broken sleep you get during the daytime and the night-time hours. You might relax and sleep more easily if you reduce screen time during the night-time hours. Watching television or hanging out on the computer can interfere with your body’s natural release of melatonin, which helps relax you for sleep. Try cutting out screen time in the hours before bed and overnight when you should be sleeping and you might sleep better when you have the opportunity to sleep.

Above all else – know that for most children the season of sleep challenges is just that – a season, if you would like to change season’s early email/phone Baby Sleep Academy and we can arrange a consultation.

– The main image above is by EveryStockPhoto.

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Flipping Babies
It’s common for babies to mix up their days and nights – especially during those early newborn days. Whether this tendency comes from time spent in utero or it’s the continual round-the-clock feeds, babies often like to hang out with eyes wide open during the overnight hours.
A common old wives’ tale persists that involves flipping a baby over to reset a sleeping schedule. According to this sleep solution, you simply lift your baby and flip her forward, head over heels. The belief is that this physical flip will reset the baby’s internal schedule so the little one will magically sleep during the nighttime hours and remain more wakeful during the daytime hours.
While you won’t do any harm if you decide to try this old-fashioned sleep remedy, do use care as you maneuver your baby.
Flipping is not something I would recommend! You will likely have more luck with nighttime sleeping if you focus on feeding your baby frequently during the day, stimulating her with light, spending time talking to her and playing with her and wake her every 2-3 hours during the day. During the night, keep activity low-key, dark and quiet to encourage sleep.

Extending Awake Periods
Your mother might advise you to try to keep your baby awake throughout the day to encourage better sleep habits at night. While this tends to make sense in theory, you might run into some unpleasant side-effects from a baby who has been awake all day.
When a baby doesn’t get the regular naps he needs throughout the day, he will become overtired and overstimulated. An overtired baby usually becomes frantic, which can make it difficult for him to settle into sleep and can cause sleep disturbances. You might even find that your baby fights sleep and wakes more quickly when he’s overstimulated.
Instead of creating a situation that involves overstimulation and an overtired infant, strive to create a regular schedule of napping and nighttime sleeping. Your little one will eventually acclimate to the schedule and his body will embrace the expected sleep more readily. It’s usually best to put your baby to bed before yawning and eye-rubbing begins because this avoids overtiredness.

Rice Cereal
At one time, mothers were urged to put a few tablespoons of rice cereal into a bottle of formula or breast milk to help a baby sleep longer at night. The conventional wisdom stated that the rice cereal would keep the baby full for longer, which would lead to longer sleep periods.
The problem with adding rice cereal to a bottle is that it can begin cycle of overeating at a very young age. Your baby’s body won’t realize that he’s taking in higher calories with the same volume of liquid. Although this might sound harmless, adding cereal to a bottle can disrupt a baby’s natural ability to stop eating when full.
Scientific evidence doesn’t support the notion that adding rice cereal to a bottle will increase sleep time or decrease crying, either.

Rock-a-Bye Baby
Mom might urge you to rock your baby to sleep or use a moving swing or vibrating infant seat. While most babies enjoy motion immensely, a problem can occur if a little one becomes overly dependent on motion. If a baby becomes so accustomed to motion that he will not sleep without it, you’ve created a negative sleep association that could be difficult to break.
Instead of relying on motion 100 percent of the time, use it to calm your baby and ready him for sleep, but don’t allow him to sleep with motion all of the time.
By thinking carefully about sleep and the way you approach it with your baby, you can make wise decisions that will lead to positive sleep habits.

– The main image above is by EveryStockPhoto.

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What’s Normal
You’ve probably heard numerous stories about baby champs who sleep for 12 hours each night. These little angels go down for naps and at night without a peep and the parents don’t hear from them again until well after sunrise. This sleep schedule may be a beautiful thing – but it’s also far from normal. Typical babies wake at night, due to hunger, discomfort and simple sleep cycles. If your baby is waking periodically throughout the night, rest assured that your little one is likely showing normal baby behavior.

Every Family is Unique
It’s easy to look at other families from the outside and make conclusions based on the tiny snapshots you see. You only get glimpses of the actual landscape of a family and of how the family unit operates, though. Because every child and every family is unique, resist the urge to compare your child and family with other children and other families.

Look for Support with Baby Sleep Issues
As you navigate your way through the maze of baby sleep issues, any support and empathy you can find from other parents, friends and family will help you. Baby sleep issues can be challenging for any parent, especially when you add sleep deprivation to the equation. The ability to share experiences, trade tips and receive support during your struggles can help lighten the load. Seek out other parents who indicate that all isn’t perfect in their sleep world. You might run into these other zombie parents at baby and toddler groups, the supermarket, the park or right within your neighborhood. Make a connection with these parents so you can encourage each other, listen to the horror stories and celebrate the sleep victories.

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Of course, 3 am is not the time for a family get-together, so when baby disrupts your preschooler’s sleep, it’s time to take steps to minimize the sleep disturbances. Take a few creative measures to help your 3-year-old get the sleep she needs.
Start with an explanation to your older child so she understands what’s causing the upset. The simple conversation might just be, “Baby is not such a good sleeper yet, is he? He’s trying to learn, but it takes time.” You might try brainstorming some sleep strategies with your youngster for ways she can cope with the noise at night. Hugging a stuffed animal tightly, closing her eyes and thinking calming thoughts and trying to ignore the baby are possible ideas for your little one to try. In the morning praise your 3 year old for being so good during the night and staying in her own bed, if she does wake and return to sleep give her a little reward in the morning or if your going to the playground or somewhere tell her it is because she is so good during the night.

When baby’s night crying wakes his roommate, a white noise machine or playing soft music could be one solution. By playing white noise in the children’s bedroom to override the fussing noises, your 3-year-old might sleep right through without a hitch. Even light sleepers may sleep through baby’s cries with a white noise machine. Another benefit of white noise – your baby might sleep more soundly, too.

If the disturbances become too numerous and your preschooler is having trouble due to the lack of sleep, consider a temporary sleeping rearrangement until your baby begins sleeping better during the night. Your older child is probably old enough to understand the temporary reorganization, especially if you present it as a way to ensure that she has a quiet place to sleep so she feels good throughout the day. Once baby starts sleeping better, you can put the kids back together in the same bedroom again.
Although it can feel like sleep issues will never end, before you know it, your baby will master sleeping and the kids will be able to coexist happily in their bedroom.

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Regression is Common
No one sleeps well during illness, and your baby is no different. Any positive sleep routine you might have had for your baby will likely fly right out the window the minute sniffles and coughs set in. Your baby might regress and become clingy while he doesn’t feel well. Naturally, you probably want to soothe and comfort your child when he’s ill, so it’s common to cuddle a sick baby more than usual. Increased cuddling could contribute to regression, too.

Easing Symptoms
During the illness, you can help your baby sleep better by easing symptoms. Offer your baby fluids often, fluids will help prevent dehydration and loosen congestion. Try saline nose drops if your baby struggles with congestion. Running a cool-mist humidifier in the bedroom might minimize congestion, too. You might also try placing a towel or blanket under one end of the cot mattress to elevate your baby’s head slightly to ease congestion.

Relearning Better Habits
Once you’re over the worst of the illness, it’s time to encourage your little one to return to his former sleep routine. Be warned – he might not be happy about relearning his old sleep habits. In fact, he might complain vigorously. Return to your old settling routine to get your little one ready for sleep. Once you proceed through the standard routine, tuck your child into bed. If he resists or cries, tell him it’s time for sleep and promise that you’ll be right back to check on him. You might need to return repeatedly in the first night or two, but eventually, he’ll relearn how to sleep well.

Your loving consistency will help your child remember his good habits and return to them. Once he does, everyone will feel happier.

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My baby daughter is 18 months old and can’t sleep through the night. We have had a very tough few months with a night time asthma cough. We have finally sorted the cough but she continues to wake two or three every night. We have got into the habit of giving her a bottle or a soother to get back to sleep.

She also gets up very early since the time change in October -5.30 am, When she wakes at night either myself or my husband take her from her cot and put her into bed in her room and stay with her for remainder of night for the rest of the night wakening’s. It’s a mess!

Should I move her into the bed in her room? How do I stop the night wakening’s and get her to sleep through the night? She is usually exhausted an hour after getting up.

Any help to get darling daughter to sleep through the night would be so appreciated.

Response: Getting baby to sleep through the night

A few negative sleep habits have crept in here, which nearly always happens when you have a sick child. Firstly, she is too young to understand that she needs to stay in the bed and sleep through the night. I fear if you were to move her into her own bed now the evenings would turn into a nightmare getting her to sleep and that you would need to stay with her. Then you would be in with her again when she wakes during the night.

You’ll need to re-establish a baby sleep routine so I’d suggest that you choose a baby settling technique that suits you and stick to it. She is a little young to understand rewards, etc. You could use the settling method I have suggested in the ‘Put Baby to Sleep’ post. When you leave the room tell her you will be back to her in a minute but go back in after a few seconds initially. You will need to use the same settling technique every time she wakes during the night. If you do have difficulty settling her in the evening, use the same technique and be sure not to give her any more bottles. If you give her a soother get her to search for it herself by taking her hand to search for it and getting her to put it in her own mouth. You will also need to stop taking her into your bed at 5.30am. It is very common for children to wake at this time as this is when she naturally goes into a very light sleep, see my article on baby sleep cycles. It takes time and a lot of perseverance to change the negative sleep associations that have been establish when your baby was ill. You should continue to resettle her in the morning in her cot until approximately 7am. Initially she will not go back to sleep for you, so when you decide it is time for her to get up change your approach to her, go to her all happy, pick her up, open the curtains and then bring her to the living area. In time she will learn from your response whether or not it is morning time or time to go back to sleep. When she learns that she will not be getting into the bed with you in the morning she will start to relax in her cot and go back to sleep. This will take time though and you may have lots of long nights and early mornings to deal with before the issue is resolved but it is well worth putting the in time and effort to get her to sleep through the night. By being very consistent with her when she is going to bed and every time she awakes she will learn how to settle herself back to sleep again.

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We all need sleep otherwise we feel drowsy and unable to cope with life’s normal demands. Lack of sleep effect’s every aspect of our daily lives. This is the same no matter what age you are. We need sleep so our brains can rest. Sleep allows the brain to do its “filing”. When we sleep our brain sorts out and stores information, it can solve problems! Scientists also believe that it is when the brain produces proteins and hormones. If you miss one night’s sleep you might feel irritable the next day, if you miss two night’s sleep you may not be able to think properly or focus. If you miss a number of consecutive nights sleep you may begin to hallucinate. Therefore sleep is vital for every living person to be able to function properly and carry out normal daily tasks.

Understanding Sleep
Deep sleep (Non-REM sleep) restores the body and is vital to remain healthy. It repairs tissues and muscles, boosts your immune system and stimulates growth and development. Light sleep (REM sleep) is very important for your mind. It processes the information you have learned during the day and produces dopamine and serotonin which are feel good chemicals which will help your mood during the day.

When we sleep, we go through a sleep cycle of deep sleep and light sleep. You go from one sleep stage to the next right through the night. Usually when an adult goes to sleep they go into a deep sleep for the first hour or two, then into a light sleep for twenty minutes, back into a deep sleep for 1 hour and then a light sleep for approximately 30 minutes. As the night goes on the amount of time you spend in a deep sleep shortens and the light sleep lengthens.

When babies or young children sleep they spend a lot less time in a deep sleep and more time in a light sleep. According to Dr Richard Ferber there are 4 sleep stages, Awake, REM, Light Non-REM and Deep Non-REM. Newborn children enter REM sleep immediately after falling asleep. By about 3 months of age a babies sleep cycle changes and they enter a non-REM sleep stage before REM sleep as we do as adults.

Richard Ferber in ‘Solve Your Child’s Sleep Problems’ suggests a babies sleep cycle is as follows;
A child will go from being awake to a Deep Non-REM sleep within 20 minutes. He/she will remain in a deep Non-REM sleep for approximately 60 to 90 minutes, followed by a brief Light Non-REM sleep for about 10 minutes. He/She will then return to a Deep Non-REM sleep for another hour or so. The child may then awake briefly and return to a Light Non-REM sleep for 30/40 minutes before returning to a brief Deep Non-REM sleep. After this the child will go from REM sleep to Light Non-REM sleep with some brief awakenings for approximately the next 5 hours. In the early morning he/she will return to a Deep Non-REM sleep followed by a brief awakening to a brief REM sleep to brief Light Non-REM sleep until they are finally awake for the day.

Considering Ferbers’ analysis of the baby sleep pattern, it is inevitable that the child can awaken a couple of hours after being put to sleep, with an increasing probability of awakening as night goes on.

Normally problems arise when a child is unable to resettle themselves after a brief awakening when non-REM sleep has been completed. This could be due to the child being hungry, circumstances having being changed after they went to sleep (i.e. not in parents’ arms anymore or their soother falls out), feeling unwell or uncomfortable, etc. Also, when children awake briefly they can talk to themselves or cry for a few moments. If a parent is too quick to respond to these activities the child may become fully aroused and be unable to resettle themselves back to sleep.

When a parent reacts too quickly in these instances, the baby can rapidly learn a negative sleep association of requiring the parents’ presence and not be able to resettle themselves unassisted. The resultant effect is that the parent must constantly tend to the child at every awakening throughout the night.

If these negative sleep associations are not addressed they can last for 3 years or may even lead to a lifetime of sleep problems for the child. It is vitally important that children get sufficient amounts of sleep as sleep deprivation can not only increase temper tantrums and irritability but can also lead to a poor immune system, hyperactivity, attention deficit disorder, increased risk of obesity and diabetes and children may be more accident prone or even develop depression.
A child who is not getting a sufficient amount of sleep is not processing the information they are learning during the day as they should. Their memory will most likely be negatively affected. They are unlikely to be as aware of their environment as other children, as they may not be as alert during the day. As lack of sleep also affects hand eye co-ordination their fine motor skills could suffer, this can lead to problems in their confidence and their ability to do things for themselves. In an older child, they may not be interested in physical activities due to fatigue and spend more time on the couch which can in some cases lead to obesity.

Inevitably, the child’s sleep problems will in turn affect the whole family as if the child is waking frequently during the night, his/her parents are also being deprived of sleep. This subsequently can lead to an increased likelihood of moodiness and irritability, depression, poor judgement, marital problems, illness, loss of motivation and in obtuse cases, depression.

As you can see, sleep deprivation has numerous effects on children and their entire family. Therefore, it is vitally important that sleep problems are addressed as soon as possible for all concerned. By analysing the child’s sleep pattern and identifying the child’s sleep pattern and associations. Negative sleep associations should be changed as early as possible so that child does not suffer long-term from the effects of sleep deprivation.

“Sleep is that golden chain that ties health and our bodies together.” 2

Quotations
1 – Richard Ferber – Solve Your Child’s Sleep Problems
2 – Thomas Dekker, English dramatist (1572-1632).

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If your child climbs out of the cot, ensure the cot is set to the lowest level and there is no toys in the cot which your child can stand on to help him get out. You should make sure the child’s landing is soft and safe to avoid injury. Closely monitor your child every night and any time your child climbs out of the cot simple put him back in lying down and leave the room. Repeat this until your child gets bored of the game and goes back to sleep. Generally after a few nights of this they don’t bother doing it any more. This greatly reduces the chance of your child climbing out during the night when he goes into a light sleep, as it will take too much effort , he will turn over and go back to sleep. However if your child is too young when he goes to a bed, his first instinct when he wakes will be to get out of bed. As your child may not understand reward systems fully it will take a lot longer to teach your child to stay in his own bed.

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A sleep association is something that a child requires to help him get to sleep. There are many types of infant sleep associations, some good and some not so good. Therefore you need to be very wary what you introduce your baby to at sleep time.  The very thing that gets your baby to sleep may very well be the reason why your baby won’t sleep through the night.

Good Baby Sleep Associations

–          Bedtime Routine

–          Cot/Crib

–          Special Blanket/Teddy

Negative Baby Sleep Associations

Anything a child needs assistance with to help him get to sleep;

–           Soother, Rocking, feeding, staying in room, etc.

–          Continuously sleeping in buggy or car

–          Falling asleep elsewhere and then being moved to cot/crib

–          Musical Mobile needing switched on

Negative baby sleep associations are the cause for most infants not sleeping through the night. When we sleep we all wake frequently during the night.  Although it is usually very brief, if we can settle ourselves to sleep we generally are not aware of being awake during the night. Children are the same, however  as a baby’s sleep pattern is slightly different.  They can wake more than an adult and if they are unable to get back to sleep, your baby may wake up as many as 5 or 6 times a night. Obviously a small baby will wake during the night for feeds.  However, if you find your baby is awakening every 40 minutes to 1 hour it is probably an negative sleep association issue.

When a baby does not sleep though the night, it can affect the whole household.  Usually some form of sleep training will normally be required to break the association. When breaking a negative sleep association I would strongly encourage you to use a gentle approach, prepare yourself, be persistent and give your baby time to learn new methods of falling to sleep unaided.

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